Buds

I apologize for incorporating this annoying bit of pop culture in my cartoons, but I wanted to use it before the Budweiser Whassup?! commercials fizzle out of existence. Steve Jobs and Steve "Woz" Wozniak co-founded Apple Computer in 1976. Although they have each gone their separate ways—Jobs back with Apple, and Woz a crusader for education—I'll bet they still call each other on the holidays and reminisce about the good ol' days.

Copy and Paste

First in 1984 with the Classic Macintosh operating system, now with Windows XP, Microsoft is infamous for their ability to Copy and Paste Apple's look and feel right into their own OS. The only thing the Evil Twin Operating System is missing is a moustache and goatee, like all our famous alternate universe doppelgängers.

800-SOS-APPL

The Apple Computer Assistance Center can be a lifesaver during a Macintosh emergency. Call 1-800-SOS-APPL, and highly trained support staff will comfort you as they recite passages from the Technical Information Library , and recommend that you reformat your hard drive and reinstall the system software. But if your Macintosh computer is out of warranty, you're Sh*t Outta' Luck.

G3 Ethernet

Apple meant well when they started producing Power Macintoshes with built-in Ethernet, but they didn't realize the havoc they would create with their original beige Desktop G3. The standard RJ-45 10BaseT Ethernet port is located on the back of the G3, very close to the the edge of the deep lipped chassis. An Ethernet patch cable can easily be inserted into the port, with its plastic anchor facing down. But just try disconnecting that patch cable, especially if it has a protective boot! That sucker takes forever to remove. The stubborn G3 owner who refuses to rotate the computer for a better rear view will have a hard time finding the Sweet Spot. And once the pressure point is located, good luck sticking your thumb between the chassis and the plastic anchor. A pencil sometimes helps, but you may have to summon nimble-fingered assistance.